Clothing Drive

So, here at my school we're having a clothing drive for the people of the island nation of Haiti. It's been really hard work and I"m starting to hate it, but we're in for the long haul, so there's no use getting all fussy about it. Clothing drives are kind of bogus, because think about it; your home and way of life has been destroyed by a hurricane and the United States, the most powerful country in the world, and a leader among nations is sending you clothes. Not even the nicest clothes that they have either, but the bad clothes, from the eighties, that nobody wants anymore. I guess that genorosity has never really been our strong suit. Anyway, so in addition to hating Haiti (not the people, just the whole situation), I'm starting to hate clothes. I'm seriously thinking of becoming a nudist. And while that really wouldn't appeal to that many people (the thought of me being naked) I'm just done with them. Being surrounded by clothes for hours at a time really makes you wonder what's the point of it all. And of course, you start turning against your fellow sorters like some sort of twisted Lord of the Flies. You all start singing and humming to yourself in ways that would make even the most disturbed degenerate look at you sideways and move to the other side of the bus. Any job where you are in close quarters with someone, for long periods of time, tend to make you hate them a little bit. And you die a little inside. Before I wrap this up, let me offer you some tips for the next clothing drive that you're a part of so that the people sorting and packing the clothes won't hate you and think that you're a total idiot: 1) Don't send dirty clothes. Nobody likes picking through your pit stained t-shirts. 2) Send something that someone one day, will want to wear. If it's ugly as sin, don't send it to people who have lost everything. I mean, jeez, that's just common courtesy. And finally 3) Don't send underwear! I can't stress this enough people, nobody and I mean, nobody (except for the freaks out there) wants to touch your nasty underwear. Nobody wants to have them, and nobody wants to sort through them. If you're giving your clothes to charity, please don't send underwear, unless they are new, straight from the store, and haven't been worn. They have to meet all of those requirements, or else we don't want them. And we hate you.