Cold Pool

You know who I hate? Jay F-ing Leno. I mean, will this guy just go away already? First off, this wanker Ben Silverman (who you just know wears a cell phone ear piece all the time and starts every sentence off with 'dude') cancels Medium to put on JL's new suckfest; "The Jay Leno Show", and then, well, it hasn't started yet, but I'm positive I'm going to have more to complain about when it finally does hit the ground dying. We were ready to say goodbye to old JL, you know? But he's like the guy, that you say goodbye to, cause, he's going out of the country for three years to join the Peace Corps. And you spend this wonderful night together, holding each other, and singing 'Save Tonight', and then you kiss passionately as he gets in his car to head to the airport. But then, two hours later, you need to get some beef broth and there he is, on aisle ten, because that a-hole forgot to pack deodorant. WHERE ARE YOU GOING THAT DOESN'T HAVE DEODORANT, ANYWAY??? WELL, I DON'T LIKE THAT ZIMBABWEAN DEODORANT! WTF DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING??? And I mean, on one level, you're kind of glad to see him, but on the other, you just wish he'd get on his f-ing plane so you can stop holding your stomach in for one g-d minute. Um, where was I going with this? Oh yeah, Jay Leno. What a tool.